The Cat Came Back...

I’ve just had one of the most scariest experiences ever.

I just went downstairs to find that cat asleep on the settee again, I told him to leave but because I’m not fluent in cat language he just looked at me and meowed.

I tried picking him up, but as you can probably tell by the photos he’s a very big cat. As I tried lifting him he somehow rolled back and rolled off the settee backwards onto the floor landing on his head in a kind of ‘S’ shape.

…he lay there not moving.

I ran into the kitchen panicking, I didn’t know what to do, there was a cat lying on the floor that I killed, wait a second…

I’VE KILLED SOMEONE ELSE’S CAT!!!!

I could go to jail for this! Maybe if I said I found him like that maybe I’ll just get a fine or something. I could go out and when I get back I could act all shocked, yeah, that’s a good idea…I’ll just get my shoes.

I started doing up my shoes as fast as I could, my alibi was sorted, all I had to do was leave the scene of the crime. As I went to do up my other shoe that cat was playing with the laces, I pulled them away still in a panic about doing them up in time before anyone got home and found…wait…

That cat was playing with my shoe laces…but…he’s not dead.

He was half asleep when he rolled back, he must have landed and gone straight back to sleep.

I felt so relieved as he got up and walked off into the kitchen, only to throw up all over the kitchen floor.

…gross!